The crazy emails you get from weirdoes. Here’s two:

From some hopeful guy in Africa:

> Dear sir
> I would like you to send me one of the 16-20 years hot girls. I am in need
> of a girl lover please may I get one. I am here in Uganda , mbale district ,
> in senior four mbale senior secondary school.

The weird thing is, he didn’t include an address for me to send the girl to.

And from a friendly Indian:

> Dear Sir,
> I am happy to see your videos.They are good. But I request you to send me
> videos in which
> teen girls are getting fucked for the first time. I don’t want videos in
> which men are teasing the teen’s pussy. I want to see videos of teen sex.
> I want to thank you for your work and also wish you a big success in
> future..I wiil always be very keen to see the updates.
> I would be very greatful to you if you can send me a very hot movie of
> teen sex and not sucking or teasing, of 30 min length within a week.
> With Regards,
> ANAN

Interestingly they both addressed me as sir.

On occasion I send out a newsletter to remind people of new things on the site. I often get mad, crazy or plain funny replies to the address I use as a return address. Here’s the best of the bunch today:

“I will be in court Wednesday and Thursday, February 7 & 8. If you need immediate assistance, please contact Assistant District Attorney, [so an so..name removed to protect the porn hound’s co-worker] at xxxxx@somecounty.gov or the ADA on your case. Thank you.”

Yes…some douchebag district attorney signed up to a PORN NEWSLETTER using his actual official work email address.

A long time ago I used to work at an online adult company as the head of marketing. At the time we weren’t that large and I personally reviewed all the customer service emails and started a little thing I called “E of the D” which is short for “Email of the Day”.

You’ll notice my bro Billy Watson does the same thing which he calls “Super Fun Emails“.

So, in his honor I’m bringing back E of the D to OP. Here’s today’s:

“thanks again and enjoy
my favorite and hobby : pic clitoris,vagina,hairy and analsex
my hobby : oralsex,analsex,licking vagina,licking clitoris,and drink sperma..
my love vagina and clitoris…ohhhh yesss.

kutilangdara Jakarta,Indonesia.”

Okay, yes, not funny HAHA but more like funny WTF? Which is almost as good.