Hot on the heels of the greatest .gif ever comes this - the greatest music video ever, toppling Whitesnake’s “Here I go again” in a single booty shake.

If you have an internet connection and eyes, surely you already know this cutie is internet sensation and honeymoon pornstar Jordan Capri.

Check it, when I’m getting down to make some porn, either personal or public there is only one artist I can always count on to be my go-to for music to put her in the mood. People are going to think, ‘Oh, Prince!’ or, ‘Oh, Barry White!’

Nope.

R. Kelly. This is a guy facing a 21 count indictment for filming himself banging underage groupies and he still writes songs like this. You have got to give it up to the brother, he is so romantic, he can’t STOP the romance from coming out.

We wit’ you Kels! Don’t stop being you.

Mandingo. “Forced to mate with the most beautiful women on the plantation…” Heh, nice work if you can get it.

The Smoke Detector. Song o’ the day.

From the recent Rilo Kiley album ‘Under the Blacklight’. You should definitely NOT steal this track online, but in fact go buy the entire album at full retail price.

There’s something about Jenny Lewis, she does the chick emo-confessional thing, but she can also do everything from country twang to phone sex operator. In my book that’s a damn great range. If you listen to the track of the day…shit it sounds disco, but it’s DIRTY!

And isn’t everything better when it’s dirty?

If you are a music snob I would LOVE you to comment and express how ‘glib’ my enjoyment of Rilo and Jenny is because REAL music lovers only enjoy hearing a Sainte-Colombe composition faithfully played on an historically correct 7 string viola de gamba.